Sexual Assault (Download a pdf version of this fact sheet) Women and children of all ages and backgrounds experience sexual assault. It can happen to anyone, anywhere, at any time. And because sexual assault is usually perpetrated by men they know, many women and children don't report assaults due to fear, shame or the feeling that they will be blamed or not believed. Those who do, often have very negative experiences of the legal system and can also experience a lack of understanding and support from people around them. It's important to understand that sexual assault is not about sex, it's about power. Sexual assault has far-reaching emotional, social, medical, political and legal consequences. It is a serious, widespread problem in our society and its prevalence reflects the extent to which the basic human rights of women and children are undervalued in our society. What is sexual assault? Sexual assault is any unwanted sexual behaviour that causes humiliation, pain, fear or intimidation. It includes rape, incest, child abuse, and unwanted or unwelcome kissing and touching. It also includes behaviour that does not involve actual touching. Forcing someone to watch pornography or masturbation, for example, constitutes sexual assault, as does sexual harassment. Commonly held myths The many myths that surround sexual assault are actually very destructive. Such mis-conceptions help disguise how widespread sexual assault is and how traumatic the effects can be. By shifting the blame away from the perpetrator, these myths contribute greatly to women and children feeling isolated and bad about themselves. Here are just a few... Women ask for it. They enjoy and deserve to be sexually assaulted. Rapists aren't like normal men ­ they're sick and aren't responsible for their actions. Men are naturally more aggressive than women and can't control their sexual desires. Most rapes and sexual assaults are committed by strangers. Only certain types of women and children are sexually assaulted, and only certain people commit sexual assault. If you agree to go out with someone, or ask them to your place, you're obliged to have sex with them. When you're married or living with someone, it's your duty to have sex with them. Only bad girls are sexually assaulted as children. Children can be seductive and lead men on. And the reality... Sexual assault is a humiliating, violent experience that no one wants or invites. Rape is not about sex, it's about power. Most perpetrators of sexual violence are ordinary men and are able to control their sexual desires if they want to. Most women and children know the person who has abused them. Sexual assault occurs across all social classes, income levels, races and age groups. You have the right to refuse to have sex. This includes saying no to the person you go out with, have invited home, are married to, or are in a relationship with. The person who commits the assault is to blame, not the person who's been assaulted. What are the impacts of sexual assault? Women or children who've been sexually assaulted, whether recently or in the past, will be affected in different ways. There is no `correct' response to abuse. If you've experienced the assault yourself, have been a witness to the violence, or are a friend or a member of the family of someone who's been assaulted, the effect can be emotionally traumatic and damaging. While it's important to understand that everybody's response is different, it's quite common for women or children to experience immediate shock, fear and anger after an assault. Later, it is quite normal for them to feel guilty and depressed. Common responses include: Self blame Feeling numb, dirty or afraid Anger and outrage Thinking you're going mad Crying a lot Feeling alone and friendless Having disturbed sleep Experiencing anxiety and panic attacks Mistrust and fear of men Denial Feeling ambivalent towards the perpetrator Silence Confusion and a feeling of vagueness and unreality Thinking you should `look after' everyone else How can I best support someone who's been sexually assaulted? Trying to support someone who has been sexually assaulted can be painful and confusing at times. It's often difficult to know how to act, and what to say. You may find it helpful to get professional advice. However, there are some simple do's and don'ts which may be useful as a guide. Do's Believe her Listen to her Stay as calm and supportive as you can Be prepared to simply spend time with her Reassure her that you are happy to talk about what she wants to talk about Help with everyday tasks like cooking, cleaning, babysitting Provide reassurance by respecting her strength as a survivor Respect her decisions and allow her to make her own choices Understand that healing can take time, space and energy Respect her desire to be private, or silent Encourage her to seek counselling or other professional support Don'ts Never blame her for what has happened. Don't try and take charge. Don't take angry outbursts personally. Don't ignore or try to smooth over the affects of rape. Don't sympathise or try to explain the actions of the person who committed the assault. Don't insist that she gives you details of the assault. Don't offer support you can't give. What are the steps to recovery? Every woman's experience and reaction to abuse is different. And because of the powerful effects of emotions like shame, self blame, fear and hurt, the steps to recovery are notsimple or straightforward. When women continue to blame themselves and take responsibility for the behaviour of others, the vicious cycle of hurt and fear continues. Often the abuse and its impacts need to be understood before recovery can even begin. For women and children who have been sexually abused, learning to respect and trust themselves and others is not easy, particularly where trusting relationships with family, partners or `friends' have been scarred by the abuse. Some women may need to share the impacts of the abuse with a supportive listener, have counselling, or join a self-help group. You don't have to suffer in silence As difficult as it may be, for many women the first step to dealing with any form of sexual abuse is to tell people. Confiding in an experienced counsellor or someone you trust may give you the opportunity to be listened to. It will also affirm that the abuse is not your fault and help establish support networks. And because sexual assault relies on a culture of silence and secrecy, telling someone may even help in stopping the abuse. Where can I go for emergency assistance? There are many groups and organisations throughout Victoria which provide help and support. Centres Against Sexual Assault (CASAs) are located throughout Victoria, and offer 24 hour crisis services, including counselling, support, advocacy and advice on medical and legal options. CASAs also offer support and information to people who want to support someone they know who has been sexually abused. Do I have to report the assault to police? This is entirely up to you. If you are feeling unsure, it's a good idea to contact a CASA and discuss your options with one of their experienced and supportive workers. They are happy to listen to what you have to say, provide any information you want, and will respect your needs and what you decide to do. Can I receive compensation if I've been sexually abused? As the victim or as a person adversely affected by a violent crime or childhood sexual assault, you may be able to get financial assistance from the Victims of Crime Assistance Tribunal (VOCAT). This assistance can cover expenses such as counselling and medical expenses, loss of income and replacement clothing. You may even be entitled to special financial assistance for pain and suffering. To find out more, ring the Victims Referral and Assistance Service, or log on to www.legalonline.vic.gov.au What is sexual harrassment? Sexual harassment is behaviour of a sexual nature that is unwelcome, unasked for, and unreturned. It can be physical, verbal or written, and includes sexual requests or advances, comments about a person's sex life or appearance, suggestive behaviour like leering or ogling, displaying sexually offensive material, physical contact such as brushing up against someone, unwanted touching or fondling. Is sexual harrassment illegal? The Victorian Equal Opportunity Act of 1995 made sexual harassment in the workplace unlawful, regardless of gender or sexual orientation. Taking action against sexual harassment, wherever it occurs, takes considerable courage and determination. So it helps to get support from people you trust to do this. All women have the right to be free from sexual harassment. But as with all sexual abuse, women often feel isolated, and made to feel they're in the wrong if they assert this right. If you want to consider making a complaint under the act, you can contact the Equal Opportunity Commission Victoria. Getting Legal Advice For information about your legal options including crimes compensation and intervention orders see WIRE information sheet Getting Legal Advice. Where do I go for help? WIRE Centres Against Sexual Assault (CASAs) Victorian Sexual Assault Crisis Line (after hours) Immigrant Women's Domestic Violence Service Victims Referral and Assistance Service Equal Opportunity Commission Victoria Community health centres Victoria Police Women's Domestic Violence Crisis Service The Gatehouse Centre (for children) Contact WIRE For information, support and an up-to-date contact list of the services available: Phone 1300 134 130 for the cost of a local call, or 13 36 77 (National Relay Service for hearing impaired women) Drop in to the Women's Information Centre on the Ground Floor, Queen Victoria Women's Centre, 210 Lonsdale St, Melbourne Email us at inforequests@wire.org.au References CASA House pamphlets: Breaking the Silence Don't feel shame CASA House Publications Equal Opportunity Commission Victoria website www.eoc.vic.gov.au Gatehouse Centre pamphlets: For the assessment & treatment of child abuse royal children's hospital Visiting the doctor Child Abuse Information Kit R J Goldman & JDC Goldman `The Prevalence and Nature of Child Sexual Abuse in Australia', Australian Journal of Sex, Marriage and Family,1988, 9:2, 94-106 State Government Victoria Justice Department publications: What are my rights? Additional entitlements for victims of childhood sexual assault What are my rights? Additional entitlements for victims of crime Victims Referral & Assistance Service booklet Information for Victims of Crime Victorian Community Council Against Violence publication Violence Against Women: What can I do? The production of these sheets was made possible with a grant from the Law Foundation. Every effort has been made to ensure the information contained in this sheet is accurate and current at the time of printing. However, no responsibility will be taken for the accuracy or reliability of the information, or for any loss which may arise from errors, omissions, or changes to government policy or the law.

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